It is important to nourish and love yourself while you learn your new life with grief.
Learning and living with grief takes time, support, and time. Be gentle with yourself as you get there.
Choosing to suppress lactating or to donate your breastmilk is very personal.
I relate it to being introverted or extroverted - neither is wrong, both have personalities and quirks, but it looks different to people on the outside.
What heals you, just like what comprises your hopes and your dreams and your heart, will not be the same for everyone.
That is okay. The first step is choosing. The second is doing.
Empty arms somehow make everything feel heavier, sometimes even breathing.
Your responsibility is not to help others understand that. I don’t know that it is possible anyway. You are responsible for:
finding a way to still live, and you will
helping your body recover, knowing there will be changes that are visible
(including you may have milk come in from days 3-10 postpartum, even with a loss as early as 12 weeks gestational age),
as well as emotionally and mentally
helping your soul remember to be as alive as “before” with this added color of loss